Let it out.

 

Going through a break up is very much like a grieving process. It is completely normal to feel overwhelmed by a number of different emotions, especially during the initial stages of the break up. Let these emotions out - you have every right to be upset, losing someone you've cared about deeply is a devastating experience. Letting these emotions out is much better than keeping them bottled up. Have a good cry, watch a sad movie and listen to those soppy songs. Just don't let it carry on too long!

 

After your initial "mourning" period, where it feels like you can't function normally without breaking down, you need to take a big step forward, and not fall back. Of course, you will still feel sad now and again, but you can't let it stop you from getting on with your life. After you've had your break down, you need to pick yourself up and carry on. It can be really helpful to write an imaginary letter you him. Write down everything you wish he knew, about how you feel and what he's done to you. Don't send the letter to him - this is just to help you; it really doesn't matter for him to know any of your feelings now, there's no need for him to know because it wouldn't change what's happened. Writing down what you want to say to him helps let it out, without falling into the cycle of speaking to him, which ultimately leads to more hurt. This process can help you to see more clearly that you aren't to blame for the break down of the relationship, and how much of a fool he is to let you go.

 

Let it out, and let it go.

 

Remember the bad as well as the good.

Those rose tinted glasses really get in the way of moving on sometimes. It is too easy to remember all of those lovely times together, which by no means do you want to erase from your memory. However, it is important to remember that there were bad times too. You did break up for a reason; it wasn't as rosy as you keep reminding yourself.

Take him off the pedestal you've put him on, and bring him back down to reality; he isn't the perfect man for you. If he was, you would still be together.

This recurrent reminiscing is allowing you to dwell on the break up, which needs to stop. You're drowning in the past, and need to think ahead; to a positive future, as well as making the most of here and now. Stop thinking about what was and what could have been - there clearly were issues within the relationship that couldn't be fixed. It wasn't meant to be. This isn't a bad thing - it's a blessing! Now that you're single, the perfect man can find you! And even better, you're now liberated of a relationship that wasn't working.

No matter how much you focus on the beautiful memories you have with him, you know there were bad times too. Whenever you find your self dwelling on happier times with him, remember 5 things that you didn't like about him, and think about different qualities that you'd like to find in your next relationship.